Are we Sadists?

Load Visual Studio; TFS is down. Connect to VPN. TFS still shows ‘offline’. Click ‘Go Online’; it doesn’t take. Close Visual Studio. Re-open Visual Studio. TFS Connects.

Look for CI server for Python. Stumble onto Jenkins. Try to configure it. Go mad. Write CI system.

Use Git. Accidentally wipe History. Push. Realize History is wiped. Ask someone else to push --force and hope they haven’t pulled. Get chastized by internet.

Try to use AWS tools. Download AWS Command Line Tools (AWS CLI). Realize AWS cloudsearch commands don’t convert documents. Documentation says they do. Realize AWS has a separate set of tools for CloudSearch called the ‘CloudSearch Command Line Tools.’ Read AWS Cloudsearch Command Line Tools Documentation. Realize it doesn’t use AWS Credentials file the same way the AWS CLI Tools do. Hardcode keys.

Try to use SQL Server Management Studio on a Mac Book Pro Retina in a Parallels VM. Pain ensues.

Try to use Google’s Two Factor Authentication and One Time Passwords. Try to find One Time Passwords in settings. End up going to Google+ settings. Try again. End up going to Gmail settings. Try again. Fail. Turn off Two Factor Authentication.

Use JavaScript. Get bitten by this.

Upgrade iPhone to iOS 8.1 without doing an iTunes Backup. iTunes fails to update, effectively bricking iPhone. Try to restore from iCloud backup after allowing iTunes to fresh restore. iTunes doesn’t allow a restore from backup after ‘reset phone to factory settings’ is chosen. Lose progress in Worms (Challenge 48).

Attempt to Dual Boot Windows 8.1 and Linux. Spend months trying to get it to work, before troubleshooting causes Windows Boot to stop working. Nuke SSD and start over with an Ubuntu VM.

Have two young children. Get an evening to code after they’re in bed. Load Windows. Windows requires updates. Ignore. Try to install new version of Framework. Windows requires updates. Install Updates.

Have a Windows PC updating. Get on Mac Book Pro and dive into Xcode. Need new version of Framework. Mac requires updates. Ignore. Try to install new version of Framework. Mac requires updates. Install Updates.

Have a Mac PC updating. Try to watch Amazon Instant Video. Start Smart TV. Start Amazon. Wait for Amazon to upgrade. Buy TV Show. It stalls on “Still Loading your Video.” Turn off TV. Turn TV back up. Start Smart TV. Start Amazon. Watch show.

Wife wants to update iPhone to 8.1. Installer claims not enough space. Deletes all Apps. Not enough space. Moves all photos to Photo stream. Not enough space. Buys more iCloud Space. Update downloads.

Attempt to look at WordPress.com settings. Claims I have to sign in using 2FA. Click on “Stats. Click on “dashboard”. Get To blog settings without signing in to 2FA.

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